<nettime> The Third Way in New Media Art

[Nettimers_anonymous <nettime@bbs.thing.net>]

The Third Way in New Media Art
Leading European New Media Centres Launch Privatisation Offensive


London, 13.07.2000 - In a press conference held in the BBC-Tower in
central London today a joint initiative by leading European New Media
Centres was announced. The ICI, Lex Centre and Orgtec, London, together
with De Waffle, Amsterdam, V1, Rotterdam, CKM, Karlsruhe, ASE, Linz and
Netpack, Vienna, announced that within a years time they want to form a
holding company with the aim of bringing it to the stock market. To
underline their efforts towards privatisation, only a handful of selected
journalists was admitted to the briefing, which was at the same time
broadcasted via satellite conference systems to the board rooms of leading
IT- and financial services firms worldwide. 

Reading from a written statement by the ICI director Philipp Dodgy (who
was absent), his deputies Heidi Hairdryer and Benjamin Vile said that "it
would be an illusion that new media art can remain in the public sphere. 
Privatisation is the only key to success".  To achieve their goal of
making money through issuing stocks, "staff of new media centres will have
to go through training courses in corporate style new management methods". 
Representants of IT-consultancy firms Cap Virgo and Anderson Insulting
confirmed that their respective companies would be taking new media art
managers on specially taylored courses at preferential rates. "It is
widely acknowledged that the stakeholders society is a huge success in
every aspect of human live, so why not also in new media arts", they said. 

Program makers at new media centres such as Hairdryer, Vile, Marie
Wrangler, Gregor Single-Malt or Garfield Stueckler will go through 6
months training courses to learn how they can successfully develop their
brands.  No concrete numbers for costs of these training courses were
given but they are said to be "under ten million pound sterling".
Critizism, that this money might furtherly reduce budgets available for
artists - which have been marginal already until now - was strongly
rejected. "The culture of the Third Way" Vile said, "is that style ranks
over substance. We subscribe to that".  "We have to create a culture of
exclusivity", Hairdryer agreed, "only then investors will recognize the
symbolic value of our new media centres". 

Rumours that the new British Prime Minister Peter Mendelson had ordered
this drive towards privatisation by threatening to withdraw lottery
funding are said not to be true. Peter Mendelson, who is on holiday on
David Bowies private island on the Bahamas, was not available for comment. 

According to Gregor Single-Malt from the Lex Gallery "all this critizism
from depraved artists and journalists is pure nonsense. Our relentless
drive to privatisation is our very own idea and therefore will surely
succeed." 

"We have already shown that we do not have to know much about new media
art to successfully run our businesses. We have no doubt at all that with
better management techniques the IPO will go ahead as planned withing a
year", said a collective statement of the new media art alliance that was
distributed at the press conference. 

Business analysts in the City of London, however, reacted in a slightly
sceptical manner. "If all this had happened in 1998/99 I would have given
it a chance. But if they do not bring any major players on board such as
the Giggleheim or Museum Luddite, I doubt that the stock will find that
booming reception they are obviously hoping for" one unnamed source from
Deutsche/Wankers Trust Internet department said. 

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