Biotic Baking Brigade on Thu, 10 May 2001 18:12:42 +0200 (CEST)

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<nettime> Pie Times News Digest #1!

     [orig To: BBB Correspondents <>]

Dear correspondents,
Revolutionary pastry greetings after a long hiatus. I have been 
toiling away as an editor at the new Earth First! Journal, which 
recently moved from Oregon to Arizona.

Due to feedback from correspondents, I'm starting the first official 
Pie Times New Digest with this post. If the pies keep flying, then 
the posts will as well--and all indications suggest that this 
movement's time has come. The recent flanning of James Wolfensohn 
marked a special moment in the history of the global pastry uprising, 
as it completed the Holy Trinity of entartement: the heads of the 
World Bank, International Monetary Fund and World Trade Organization 
have all been pied.

It's fascinating how pie attacks spread like wildfire through certain 
geographical regions. The American West, Australia, Eastern Europe, 
Britain and now Scandinavia have all had their flashpoints. 
Hmmm...would make a fascinating case study.

Please contact me for any additions or removals of email addresses to 
this list.

>From the wildlands of Turtle Island, remaining a proud purveyor of 
palatable projectiles,

Agent Apple for the BBB


Wolfensohn Creamed!

The director of the World Bank, James D. Wolfensohn, was pied March 
29 in Finland by the Arctic Baking Brigade (BBB), the first such 
attack in the country. Wolfensohn was starting his press conference 
when 2 soya-cream pies attacked him. They landed on his face. He 
seemed a bit surprised, but then said: "Mmm. Tastes good but I'm on a 
diet. "

"We managed to cancel the press conference. It's hard to give an 
impression of a respected economic leader with your face covered in 
soya-cream," said the deputy commander Marzipan, who was honored to 
throw the first pie in Finnish history. The deputy commander Pomada 
threw the second cake pie and scored also, even though she had to 
throw her cake from a few meters away. Deputy commanders Nonpareils 
and Cardamom successfully covered for them.

"Cakes are the best way of communicating with these totally 
undemocratic organizations, like the World Bank," the group said in 
their press release.
When Wolfensohn chose not press any charges, the group proclaimed, 
"So the case is closed as far as the police are concerned. But for 
us, this is just a beginning...."

However, the Finnish prime minister's office later filed an official 
criminal complaint against the two entarteurs.

Wolfensohn expressed his frustration that "these types of 
non-governmental organizations find it so easy to play their little 
games, when out in the field people are dying of poverty. This sort 
of thing really enrages me."

The BBB received the following communication from Subcommander Pomada
of the ABB: "It's been a busy month for us with all the media 
attention (too many interviews with commando-style cook hats), the 
police hearings and having politicians say  such nasty things about 
us, but it was worth it!"

A classic pie action shot is online at:


Swedish finance minister pied in Stockholm

During a ceremonial procession through the streets of Stockholm on 
April 6 to present the Swedish state budget, the finance minister 
Bosse Ringholm was attacked by two members of the Stockholms 
Tårtbrigade (Stockholm Pie Brigade). The activists managed to throw 
not one, but two pies in the surprised minister's face. "It was a 
vicious attack," the finance minister said to one of Sweden's tabloid 
newspapers, before continuing his walk."

Stockholm Pie Brigade writes in a press release that the aim of the 
attack was to "draw attention to the forthcoming protests in 
Gothenburg against the so-called 'social democracies' and their 
neoliberal actions both in Europe and globally. We know who are the 
losers in the privatization of apartment houses, schools and 
hospitals, in the shut down of public libraries, and in the harder 
prison sentences. We also know who will profit from this system, and 
who are responsible for these economical policies."

"We wanted to do something fun. It's a symbolic action, it shows that 
the responsible have a face and a name," one of the two activists 
commented to Arbetaren, (the official paper of SAC, Sweden's 
revolutionary anarcho-syndicalist union).

According to the group, the attack was part of the international 
initiative "Operation Dessert Storm." The initiative comes from 
activists that strongly sympathize with the international 
pie-throwing network Biotic Baking Brigade. They have pronounced that 
April is to be an international pie-throwing month.

An irritated Ringholm told news reporters that, "This is the kind of 
thing you do when arguments no longer work!" Anti-Fascist 
Action--Sweden responded by saying, "How right you are Mr. Ringholm!"

Photo at:


The BBB received the following communication from Norway:

"Hi, we are Bergen Bloetekake Brigade from Bergen, Norway. Wednesday 
we threw a cake on the minister of... don't know the name in english. 
but her name is Sylvia Brustad and she is responsible for all the 
housing problems in Norway."

And two weeks later, according to Reuters, Norway's Foreign Minister 
Thorbjoern Jagland was in for a surprise when protesters threw cream 
pie in his face.

He light-heartedly cleaned himself up and proceeded to lead a labour 
march in Oslo.


Pies in the face of Swedish European Union (EU) politicians

Three EU-friendly Swedish federal politicians were attacked with 
cream pies on March 6 at the beginning of a debate about Sweden's EU 
policies in the university town of Lund in southern Sweden. The 
Syndicalist Youth Federation, SUF, in Lund have taken responsibility 
for the action. The politicians have complained about their 
dry-cleaning bills!

  "Someone had to do something to get a debate started. EU is a deeply 
undemocratic organisation and all of us who are critical to the heart 
of the project, capitalism, have almost no platform at all in the 
debate that is only about small changes to the system," said one of 
the entarteurs.

More info:


British Minister Gets Her Just Desserts

Clare Short, Britain's International Development Secretary, was 
custard-pied on March 5 in recognition of her disservice to the 
world's poor.

Just Desserts, or Dim ond Cwstard in Welsh, pied her when she visited 
Bangor in north-west Wales this evening. She was delivering a lecture 
on globalization at the University of Wales, when three local 
patisseristas presented her with custard pies in Short-crust pastry, 
made with fair-trade bananas and local organic ingredients. Ms. Short 
is believed to be the first government minister on earth to have 
received a special Cabinet Pudding.

Baked to a new recipe, the pies have been christened the Short-crust 
Bananas Turnover, to mark both the minister's political volte-face 
and the madness of her current globalization policies. Ms Short was 
doubtless pleased to note that after the pie-ing there was a marked 
Trickle-Down Effect, as her clothes were enriched by the same 
commodities which had been imported into her face.

Agent Cwstard commented, "Clare Short's bananas policies are flying 
in the face of ministerial promises to help the world's poor and 
protect the environment. Our alternative flan of action involves 
policies which stick while distributing the fruits of the global 
economy to those who are most deserving."

Regarding this event, acclaimed journalist John Pilger wrote the 
following in the New Statesman (London):

"At  the  recent  British  press  awards,  there  was no prize for news
management.  This  was a pity, as this branch of journalism has pulled
off  some  great  scoops  lately, keeping important stories out of the
news  or  shifting  their  emphasis  away  from  the  truth.  Take the
custard-pieing  of Clare Short. Not itself a significant event, it was
certainly   newsworthy,   considering   the  wider  issues.  Moreover,
videotape  and  photographs were distributed widely. A few months ago,
when Ann Widdecombe was pied, most of the papers ran the picture, even
though it was indistinct. And Tony Blair's tomato-ing and Nick Brown's
receipt of a chocolate eclair were covered.

But  Clare  Short  is  one  Cabinet  minister  too  far. She has to be
protected;  her value to new Labour is that some people in the party's
grass  roots still believe she is one of them. She was pied as she was
telling an audience at the University of Bangor heart-breaking stories
about  the  world's  poor  and how the World Bank and other pillars of
globalisation  were  their  saviours.  She  is,  after  all,  not only
Secretary of State for Globalisation, or International Development, as
new Labour prefers, but a governor of the World Bank.

Short's  first reaction to her pieing (the pie had been baked to a new
recipe called Short-crust Bananas Turnover, to mark her abandonment of
any  political  principles and her embrace of new Labour) was to shout
at  the  camerawoman:  "Stop  that  woman. Don't let her get that film
out."  The film did get out, but Short's news managers were quickly on
to  editors, raising the question of "permission to film the meeting".
At  the  meeting,  the  author and environmentalist George Monbiot had
tried  to  distribute  lists  of  questions,  challenging  Short's and
Blair's  policies.  These  were snatched by a security guard, who said
that  he  was  under  instructions  from  a Labour Party official. The
videotape did slip on to Sky News, but the BBC and ITN showed nothing.
The Daily Mail ran a short piece on page 31, and the Guardian a single
paragraph on page 10. There were no pictures.


Anti-Capitalists Take Wellington
Tuesday, 1 May 2001, 9:38 am
Press Release: Wellington Biotic Baking Brigade

for you pre de-colonials)

Group Photo Of Wellington Biotic Baking Brigade


1. Approximately 3 million members of the Wellington Biotic Baking
Brigade have already arrived outside Wellington City, each heavily
armed with stink bombs, exploding Cuban cigars & Barbara Streisand 
albums. They are camped out in camouflaged RVs in the suburbs;

2. Among them, 30,000 JAPANESE NINJA ANARCHIST WARRIORS are preparing 
to breach the beehive at dawn. They will clear landing pads for 
several hundred ANARCHIST BLACK CROSS HELICOPTERS carrying 14,000 
BELGIAN ANARCHIST pie throwing specialists.


Dessert Storm on Mayday

Forget the lies, half truths and state propoganda that has been said about
Mayday- here is the real story: On May 1st a crack team of highly trained
anarchist pastry chefs will descend on London vowing to cover the capital in
custard. This will be known to future generations as Operation Dessert Storm
and we are talking Pie-rect action. The pastry chefs, who include Agent
Orange creme, comrade creme brulee and Brigadier Banoffee, will be making
this day custards last stand. This action will be effective in making the
state look like the raspberry fools they are. They will get just desserts.
Wee call on all of the working class to join us in this fun day out and to
put a smile back on the faces of the oppressed.
If any flan flingers do get taken into custardy, you can be sure that unlike
the pies the charges won't stick.

Here is the recipe that was handed down to us by revolutionaries of years
gone by:

10 kg of flour
1 kg of sugar
water to make it sticky
yellow food colouring
vanilla essence (optional)
Mix it alltogether, stick it on a paper plate and throw. Serves 50.


Logging Protestor and Pie-thrower sentenced to Six Months in Prison

As reported in a previous BBB email, Salmon SoufflÈ Society 
pie-thrower Randall Mark pied US Senator Helen Chenowith in Idaho. 
Because he was on probation from a previous protest against logging, 
and because Idaho is such a reactionary state, he was sentenced to a 
six month sentence.

Please write to him at:
	Randall Mark #09528-023
                 FDC unit FC
                 PO Box 13900
                 Seattle, WA 98198

If you are sending books (you can send used books) do
not include anything else in the package, such as a
letter etc. also write on the package "As approved by
BOP" and "3 books etc."

If anyone wants to visit, they have to fill out a form
from the prison and wait weeks for approval. He is getting out early (June
8th) for some reason. They may be trying to screw him
by forcing probation on him rather than letting him
finish his term.


Clowns Told to Get Custard Pie Insurance

LONDON (Reuters) - Circus clowns were told on Thursday to take out 
custard pie insurance against the risk of being sued by spectators 
who fail to see the joke.

``With an increasingly litigation-crazy public... the ethics and legal
implications of 'splatting' and 'sloshing' are expected to be hotly
debated under the Big Top,'' Clowns International said in a statement 
from its annual convention.

Although no clown has yet been sued by the recipient of a face-full of
custard pie, the organization fears it may be just a matter of time.
Martin ``Zippo'' Burton, the group's honorary vice-president, said only
fellow clowns and celebrities should be chosen, a white-faced clown must
never be hit, and careful judgement should be used to ensure that those
targeted were not averse.


"Disobedience, in the eyes of any one who has read history, is man's 
original virtue. It is through disobedience that progress has been 
made, through disobedience and through rebellion."    --Oscar Wilde

The Biotic Baking Brigade.....coming soon to a pie-o-region near you.                    

Friends of the BBB: c/o POB 40130, San Francisco, CA 94140, Amerika

Dessert Storm - an international month of pie-ing now has
open publishing news section - indymedia style - for your
photos, text, video of piesploits!!

(((  globalise the pie!  )))


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